5 ways to have true friendship in a social media world

5 ways to have true friendship in a social media world

5 ways to have true friendship in a social media world

Being a real friend in a social media world is rare.

We follow and tweet and share. All the while imagining that these virtual exchanges are enough.

That they create relationship.

Yet, I still hear the heart cries of people longing for true and deep friendship. A loneliness that echoes with hopeful reverberation as they take a chance to reach out to someone they’d like to know better.

People can dialogue all they please with quips and commentary under 140 words. That isn’t relationship. But it is a start. 

True friendship CAN be found in the virtual world. I have dear friends that I’ve never hugged in person, yet have poured my heart out to across the continent. Even across the oceans.

And it is so real.

1 Thessalonians 5:11“Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.”

What are the signs of true friendship on social media?

Do you long to develop friendships that translate into authentic relationship with your online connections?

  1. Respond to comments. When someone takes the time to reach out to you, often that took a courageous leap. Don’t leave them hanging
  2. Don’t be all about you. Remember that old adage “Become the kind of friend you wish to have”? It happens to be true. If you are engaged in social media frequently, don’t connect with any ulterior motive. If you are just networking, then network. But, the sweet spot comes when we recognize that people are not brown-nosing just to get a return favor.  Friendship trumps networking
  3. Share people’s work on social media along with a thoughtful comment. I need to work on this more myself. Time steals our attention away before we give props to the effort writers and artists and photographers and people invest to reach us. It is frequently the deepest gift they have to offer, and they give it for free. I can’t stress this enough—Encourage people
  4. Stop being a fan and become a friend. Friends care about the details of each other’s life. Remember something about the person you’d like to know. Ask them about what touches their hearts and life, and the chances are good they’ll want to know more about the person who actually cares
  5. Let it go when you feel rejected. It is easy to feel rejected when we don’t see people in the flesh. Misinterpretations are common. Remember that things happen we have no clue about. Messages go to spam, assistants ditch your note to summarize mail for the bosses, and things get lost. Or, maybe, like me, they really just got caught up in life and forgot to respond. Until 12 months later when we read a heartfelt note that we regretfully piled with the holiday decorations. It isn’t personal, move on to someone else you enjoy. Try again

Social media friendship

It allows connections we’d not otherwise have to blossom, by bringing together people with shared interests. Similar backgrounds or goals.

Social media friends aren’t the same as the ones in our “real” lives. But that doesn’t mean they aren’t real. Add another dimension to your relational circles and surprise people with your genuine offer of friendship.

Part of the reason I have this blog is to let you know you are seen. If you’d like to say hello, you can find me easily!

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Friendship resources you might enjoy:

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26 Comments

  1. Yes, yes, yes! Excellent post and so true Christa. I tend not to use the term ‘virtual’ when it comes to online friends – I prefer ‘digital’ or ‘online’ friends, as virtual implies not real.

    And for me, you are one of my ‘digital’ friends. A real friend.

    So glad you found your writing voice again. Great post.

    1. Bless you James. Hmm, thanks for the new word choices. I was sort of at a loss there, virtual didn’t sound right but yours sounds better! You are special, enjoy the day.

  2. Christa, this is amazing!!!!!!

    Doubts or no doubts, you always write wonderful posts, and this is one of the greatest!!!!

    Sunshine or rain you are always present and inspiring and engaging! All those around you are blessed by your presence and involvement in this net.

    You are a true inspiration and a blessing to me, even when i am not to be found! I do hope you know that these online friendships are very important to me, and you are at the top of the list. I should make a point to be more involved, but life and responsibilities do no leave me with much time, or energy.

    Keep up the great work, I and many others count on you for inspiration!!!!

    1. Katina! I am humbled by your kind, loving words of encouragement. I’ve honestly been struggling a bit with writing but you make me want to never stop. And never, ever worry about how much time you have to invest. Life goes in seasons, and you are welcome to come and go in my life anytime 🙂

  3. I LOVE that we got to meet in real life and share together Christa!
    This is a truly thought-provoking post, and full of ideas in order to connect ~ which is such a strong desire of mine. <3

  4. This is very well written. I just wish more people realized how much writers and leaders pour into them. How much we want to serve them, encourage them, etc… I have shared this on twitter and will on Pinterest as well. Would love to connect more in the future. 🙂

  5. Great article. I work hard at being a good online friend and get hurt at times when others don’t seem to. I have to keep remembering that it makes me happy to reach out and that I don’t need anyone to reach out to me. I am now following you and look forward to reading more. I found you from the Blogging & Business share at Joannes

    1. Welcome Cynthia, so glad you are here! That is a great attitude, you keep on doing what is right. I have struggled with that as well, and definitely on both ends. Sometimes I give a lot, sometimes not enough! Looking forward to getting to know you here

  6. Thanks for submitting this to the Blogging + Business Collective for July. All submissions get pinned to Pinterest. Have a great Sunday!

  7. So true! A great reminder that all of the ‘followers’ are real people too! I’ve made some wonderful connections online, but haven’t always cherished their friendship as I should. Thanks for this post.

  8. Thank you for the reminder how important this is. I admit that I fall short even though my intention is to connect with everyone. Authentic connection is what makes our friendships real and trustworthy.

    1. Natalie, you are doing such powerful work and your group has grown so much! Thank you for all your efforts, you bless MY life!~

    1. Julie, that is an excellent point! What a loss for all of us if we forget the humans behind the link…for sure the popular theories all seem to point to self-promotion. One person at a time makes such a difference to stop and see them, right? Thanks for weighing in

  9. I think God can bring amazing friends to our lives through social media. I completely agree with you, we must first become the friend that we would like to have. Great Post!!! Beautiful blog by the way!

    1. Awww thanks, it has been a rough year with my blog and inspration so that means SO much to me. There are such wonderful people we meet through shared interests on social media that indeed can become true friends! Have a wonderful journey

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