7 Things to Do When You Feel Worthless (That Actually Work)

Content note: This post discusses difficult feelings around body image and self-worth. If you’re struggling with these thoughts, please know you’re not alone and help is available.

I hate my body. Everyone thinks I am their “fat” friend. I am worthless. There is no hope for me. I am ugly. I am a waste of life. Maybe it would be better if I wasn’t alive at all. My husband is traumatized if he has to see me naked. I am disgusting. Repulsive. I am humiliated and ashamed.

My husband recently purchased a fancy scale.

He has encouraged me as I began a new, healthier approach to life. Not a diet, but positive changes.

Unfortunately, he connected my Fitbit to the scale. As I stepped on, it gave me unexpected and unwanted information. My body mass index (BMI).

Stunned, I walked to my bed, laid down, and wept.

A few years ago, after decades of shame, I won the battle with body image. (You can read part of my story here and here)

This number, 2 single digits, seemingly destroyed all of that.

When someone has made you feel worthless, they were wrong

The old ugly feelings came back, and I was crushed. Those painful words that used to haunt me.

Teasing words of “fatty”, “thunder thighs”, “you should be more like __________”, “you’d be so pretty if you lost weight”.

I let the tears out, then set out to fight back.

I know there are so many of you out there. Beautiful people who feel hopeless and disgraced. Disgusted with who and what you “think” you are.

Who defines beauty anyhow?

Authentic loveliness isn’t about your pounds or your numbers or your features or your boobs or your belly.

It radiates from inside when we work on a beautiful heart. It is about how much you love and laugh and give of yourself.

Feel ugly today? It is totally within your power to change that viewpoint. Start with your heart.

Let me help you. Here are 7 practical things that have nothing to do with losing weight, but everything to do with getting healthy. From the inside out.

What to do when you feel worthless

1. Prepare for the Battle (You Will Win!)

Ditch the self-pity. I believe most heavy people got that way because of a painful burden. That is so hard, but feeling stuck gets us nowhere. We aren’t alone. Jesus has compassion that never ends. I am guilty, ashamed of what I’ve done, of what I’ve become… (click here for how that story ends).

2. Work Off Those Heavy Feelings

Go clean your car, scrub the tub, anything that transfers those heavy feelings into heavy labor. I find it very difficult to cry while I am working it all out physically. This provides a healthy release from emotions and a good distraction.

3. Go for a Walk (But Not for the Reason You Think)

Take the time to breathe deeply. Don’t think about what you will gain from it physically; do it for emotional health. Notice birds singing, look to see if there is a sign of spring, listen for laughter.

Appreciate the world around you. Too often, people with body image issues are hung up on noticing the world as it relates to them physically. You don’t have time for that anymore. Relate to the world as you celebrate each step.

4. Paint Your Nails (Seriously)

Listen, we are so much more than rolls of fat. C’mon. That is so obvious, but if you have true body image issues, it is easy to forget. Do things that feel good on the outside. Soak those feet, put on lotion, find your softest shirt and enjoy the sensation against your skin.

This practice, if done frequently, makes a huge impact on the other ways we learn to respect our physical body. Today I am going for glittery red, or perhaps Gunmetal. In honor of putting on my warrior gloves.

5. Don’t Eat That Cake (Here’s Why)

I get it, that has been a go-to comfort for years. Maybe your whole life. But that piece of cake? It’ll taste good. Fantastic even. It is not, however, your friend.

Food is NOT our friend when we use it for anything but its intended purpose.

Drowning feelings? Nope. Think of stress eating like this- you might think that piece of cake is comforting, seems to always be there for you. But comfort eating doesn’t have your best interest at heart, only temporary relief that leads to more shame.

6. Skip the Hiding

It feels safer, but hiding only hinders moving forward. We can’t see the light in a cave.

7. Play Truthful Music

There are some powerful songs out there that will help you today. They have the ability to remind us of what is true about us, what really matters, how God sees us. The voice of truth will tell you a different story.

How to Overcome Feelings of Worthlessness

Remember this, we are surrounded by numbers. They are not evil. Even if we don’t like what they tell us.

The numbers though are just information. That is crucial to our healing. Being healthy is a GOOD thing, not our enemy!

So let’s move forward and search out grace. I am going to put on my Jesus glasses and find out how He sees me. Do the same.

Did you know that the light that shines from within can change anything? Don’t cheat the world from who you really are.

You are desired, loved, and worth more than you’ll ever know. Please develop a new habit-1,000 words.

Fight. You are worth it. You have so much to offer that has nothing to do with your physical being.

Change those bad food responses, but in the waiting? Choose life.

Remember: Worthlessness is a Feeling, Not a Fact

Seems like we tend to think of God’s grace as something we hope to get a few splashes of. A sprinkling. Surprise! Have you ever seen a powerful waterfall? It roars with unending drops combined into a massive flow.

That is grace. John 1:16 “For from his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace”

Do you struggle to let your confidence not be shaken by long-term body image beliefs?

It is never time to give up. It is always time to extend ourselves grace and move ahead.

Furthermore, my dear woman, you are worth more than you know. Embrace YOU. Fight to see yourself as God sees you.

I’m walking right alongside you in the journey. And if you still feel sometimes like you don’t like your body, or struggle with body image? Read my story here of hope.

A Prayer for When You Feel Worthless

Here is a prayer for you today… God bless and restore you. (You can download a free printable PDF “when you feel worthless” prayer here)

Lord,

I am confused. Hurting. Broken. I am overwhelmed with low feelings and filled to capacity with lies the world has told me. Help me to change. To see myself as YOU see me.

Let me understand your grace and that I am precious to you. Let me see my body image is a set of feelings, not fact.

Please, help me to build up my confidence, even if for the first time, and understand my worth as a woman of great value. Regardless of what an arbitrary set of numbers on a machine say, lies someone else says, or the constant assault on my value from the media.

I come before you with a mustard seed of faith today Lord, please help me become strong and healed.

Amen