Dreaming of a farm life
Dreaming of a farm life
Gram Lee was the stuff legends were made of for my country loving spirit. Born Emily Elizabeth Clark in 1848, she is where my own grandmother found her first heroine. An ordinary, though extraordinary woman, her farm life was what I aspired to.
Except, I was born into a wild land of another sort, suburban SoCal.
The Connecticut farmhouse where my 3x great-grandmother lived still stands, erected in 1792! Born in 1848 to Henry and Cornelia, she grew up on the farm established by her grandfather, Avery Clark.
Connections
As a young girl, I always felt misplaced, there in a world of freeways and neighborhoods and modern technology. I was a dreamer, and the country was where my imagination loved to visit the most.
Many days were spent in vivid adventure, along with Laura Ingalls (my heroine). I faithfully plopped down on my belly, face in hands, at 4 in the afternoon. Nestled into our big, brown corduroy pillows. Eager to visit Walnut Grove and the Little House on the Prairie family.
The prairie life was real to me, and I desperately wanted to live on a farm. To have cows and chickens and wear a bonnet. To make maple candy in the snow and climb a haystack. I wanted to be part of Laura’s family and live her rural life.
To this dreamer, Gram Lee was my very own connection to the country.
The farmgirl that never was
Emily was a woman who endured great hardship. When she was 15, her older brother Henry joined the Union Army during the Civil War. I have copies of the letters they shared–what a snapshot of the aching history of a soldier’s life! Emily was heartbroken when her brother contracted dysentery and passed away.
A few years later, she married Richard Henry Lee who also joined the Union army and passed away from tuberculosis.
A widow, she was left with two small children and a farm to run! She took things in stride because she had to. Her diaries show no complaints, just the facts in her daily life running her business.
This ordinary, though extraordinary woman, brought reality to my vision of farm life. Romanticism tempered now, by knowing of the challenges faced with the grit of necessity. She was a woman of the country and class, she persevered.
For me, the farm girl who never was, there is still hope that someday I will be.
an unspoken kinship
It is difficult to explain this longing, this kinship with a life I’ve never actually had. But perhaps our connections lie through pieces of story that were sown long before we ever came to be here.
Many of our foundations were established by generations of earth- plowing, tree- planting, animal- tending, hard-working ancestors.
Those people that dreamed of a life of freedom, often toiled every day of their life to achieve it. So that their future could have hope. Home. Place.
across the generations
Today my hands wrap around a fragile blue and white china cup. One that belonged to Gram Lee. With current scary headlines, it comforts me to remember that overcoming is in our heritage.
Perhaps Gram Lee’s tired hands rested on the heat coming from her hot cup of tea, in this very mug. Our hands connecting across many generations.
I think we’d have a good conversation today, around my wooden farm table. She’d share stories about what perseverance looked like in her own time.
Just two women, around a table, sharing story and sorrow and hope. So even though I’ve never yet lived on the farm, I have dreamed it my whole life.
Maybe someday, the country will be my forever home. For now, the city is where we dwell. But, my imagination is still strong. The prairie still beckons and the farm is still my heart home.
Even if only in my dreams…
P.S. A funny aside, it turns out that I AM part of Laura Ingalls family after all. A distant cousin. Who would have thunk? 😉
Farm dreaming resources
- Little house on the prairie complete book series
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This so touched me Christa. Although in another hemisphere, I too hanker for the farm life of my ancestors. Thank you for sharong.
This so touched me Christa. Although in another hemisphere, I too hanker for the farm life of my ancestors. Thank you for sharing.
Hello Audrey! How nice to see your name today 🙂 Thank you for sharing that, do you know much about their history?