practical jokes gone wrong {The Heimlich and Oral Hygiene}
There is a time and a place for everything, we are told. That theory also presents the notable truth, that there are times and places that should never intersect.
I do feel I should preface this piece with the following disclaimer: No one was injured in the incident described, though a mess was made which I had to clean up. All marital relations resumed in a loving manner, post Heimlich. Our family often has a slightly offbeat sense of humor. And we like it.
There is a certain element of lightheartedness that accompanies a relationship rooted in the formative years. This, unfortunately, can lead to poor judgment in matters of humor.
We do things to each other we would never, ever consider for any other person.
Go figure.
Such was the case when I saw my husband using mouthwash
Our eyes connected with a smile in the bathroom mirror…
He saw me smile a little too mischievously and his eyes narrowed. The brilliant idea of pretending to do the Heimlich just overtook me.
And I can’t believe it myself, but I acted on it.
My arms wrapped around him and his eyes grew big, I went in for a tiny squeeze, but I did NOT anticipate his reaction time.
He spun around so fast!
By his moving and my gentle squeeze, it turns out that the Heimlich can be done even while someone’s mouth is full of mouthwash.
A projectile stream of sticky, mint-infused liquid went EVERYWHERE.
The whole mirror was splattered, our counters and sinks and even on the cupboards. He takes his mouth washing very seriously.
What did we do next? Laugh
It would be so nice to say that I ran apologetically for a towel right out the gate.
No, first I laughed so hard I was literally lying on the ground. I was choking with laughter because it was so unexpected that what I was just pretending to do would happen.
Then I apologetically ran for the towel. We laughed while I cleaned up, with me beginning my desperate pleading for him to forget this ever happened and not plot his next move.
I could see in his eyes it was too late for that.
I don’t remember covering this topic when I used to teach CPR, but perhaps it would make a worthwhile addendum. Gargling and Life Saving Techniques Don’t Mix.
Don’t pity this man
Before you feel too sorry for him, trust me when I tell you I learned everything I know from this prankster.
Remind me to tell you about his extensive prep work to lower a plastic spider over my head while on the toilet. Yeah, don’t feel too bad for him.
If you must extend some pity after reading this story, consider passing it on to me.
I am still that compassionate soul who wants to help make your life better. The one with a sphere of influence and intelligent ideas. It’s just that, well…sometimes I impulsively act on the nutty things that belong only in my brain.
Usually just imagining things I think would be funny are enough. But sometimes…
In all seriousness, my husband’s sense of humor has gotten us through some of our darkest days. Laughing is the blessing that makes things stay in perspective.
It is a great treat to share life together this way, even when it gets messy.
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Girl, you are a nut. That is totally something I would do, with similar results. I can’t resist a practical joke and I am always looking for an opportunity to punk my husband. The only thing better than the prank is telling everyone about it.
Love it! Laughter is the best medicine. My husband and I love to tease one another. He once tried a spider trick on me, until he learned just how afraid I am of them. He doesn’t do that anymore. 🙂
This left me wanting to hear about his revenge. Oh that’ll be fun. Does he usually respond quite quickly or is it a plodding kind of revenge? I’ll leave you with a bit of advice from my Brownie days… “Be Prepared ….!”
Kelly! I will keep that advice near to my heart. No revenge yet, sort of. Our house is two story, the upper floor creaks horribly. Impossible to be very sneaky. When I am in the bathroom, I get terribly startled when I don’t hear someone coming. He has come in quiet on me very frequently and then innocently says, “What? How could you not hear me?” As I clutch my heart and try to slow my breathing
This is hilarious! I’m married to a prankster too! Nothing fills his love tank faster than to see me freak out and scream. I’m not a prankster, so I rarely return the favor. Maybe I need to take some lessons from you. 😉
My stepdad loved to play pranks. He purchased an item you put on a toilet seat. When the person sits down it has a short delay, and then a man’s voice says, “Hey, I’m working down here!” My aunt screamed really loud.
Then there’s the frog at the bottom of the cup. He gave someone a cup of coffee. As you lift it up to drink the rest of it, these little eyes stare back at you. That one, sadly, got broke.
Oh, Christa! I just now read this and I am laughing so hard! Oh I can imagine the whole thing! And yes this does deserve this many exclamation marks!!!
Great story Christa. A laughing house produces laughing children, or maybe more pranksters?? Probably both. Thanks for the great scene. I could smell the Scope. 🙂
Hey I have to share a prank I did on my husband. Forgive me if I’ve already shared this one. When he was in the military he had all the equipment you can imagine. Well being home alone all day I came up with what I thought was funny. He came home and I was already in bed. And when he pulled back the covers, there I was in his gas mask. Did he laugh? Yes, and I still laugh when I think about it. I had all the anticipation I used to have when as a child we played hide and seek and I was certain my siblings would never find me. And yet, I thought my loud beating heart would give me away. 🙂
Girl, you are a nut. That is totally something I would do, with similar results. I can’t resist a practical joke and I am always looking for an opportunity to punk my husband. The only thing better than the prank is telling everyone about it.
Or, keeping it as a deep secret. Ok, you are right. Much less fun that way
Love it! Laughter is the best medicine. My husband and I love to tease one another. He once tried a spider trick on me, until he learned just how afraid I am of them. He doesn’t do that anymore. 🙂
It would be fun to hear the back story on that one 🙂
I’ll have to blog about it sometime. 🙂
Very intimate &creative.
A little TOO intimate perhaps!
Too funny! I love that you and Art have such a playfulness in your marriage. It covers such a multitude of sins, yes? Wonderful story! 🙂
Yes! Thankful for the laughter in life. I bet you have plenty in yours too 😉
That is hilarious! You definitely succeeded in making me laugh. I could picture the whole thing. Love it!
Then it was worth coming out with it, love making you smile
This left me wanting to hear about his revenge. Oh that’ll be fun. Does he usually respond quite quickly or is it a plodding kind of revenge? I’ll leave you with a bit of advice from my Brownie days… “Be Prepared ….!”
Kelly! I will keep that advice near to my heart. No revenge yet, sort of. Our house is two story, the upper floor creaks horribly. Impossible to be very sneaky. When I am in the bathroom, I get terribly startled when I don’t hear someone coming. He has come in quiet on me very frequently and then innocently says, “What? How could you not hear me?” As I clutch my heart and try to slow my breathing
My friend, you are so fun! I hope you made him clean it up. I mean, he’s the one with the audacity to gargle while you’re feeling spunky. Just sayin’.
Surprisingly Bria, I cleaned up alone. The nerve of him
This is hilarious! I’m married to a prankster too! Nothing fills his love tank faster than to see me freak out and scream. I’m not a prankster, so I rarely return the favor. Maybe I need to take some lessons from you. 😉
My stepdad loved to play pranks. He purchased an item you put on a toilet seat. When the person sits down it has a short delay, and then a man’s voice says, “Hey, I’m working down here!” My aunt screamed really loud.
Then there’s the frog at the bottom of the cup. He gave someone a cup of coffee. As you lift it up to drink the rest of it, these little eyes stare back at you. That one, sadly, got broke.
Love your stories. Yes i remembered what pranksters you two were.
Oh, Christa! I just now read this and I am laughing so hard! Oh I can imagine the whole thing! And yes this does deserve this many exclamation marks!!!
Oh, funny! I read this in the past and commented before. LOL So yeah, this was a story worth repeating!
Great story Christa. A laughing house produces laughing children, or maybe more pranksters?? Probably both. Thanks for the great scene. I could smell the Scope. 🙂
Hey I have to share a prank I did on my husband. Forgive me if I’ve already shared this one. When he was in the military he had all the equipment you can imagine. Well being home alone all day I came up with what I thought was funny. He came home and I was already in bed. And when he pulled back the covers, there I was in his gas mask. Did he laugh? Yes, and I still laugh when I think about it. I had all the anticipation I used to have when as a child we played hide and seek and I was certain my siblings would never find me. And yet, I thought my loud beating heart would give me away. 🙂
Oh Anne, so sorry it took me awhile to see this. I missed it somehow. What a fun story! I bet his hear just JUMPED!!!